Album: Loose Ends
Track: Father Figure
Artist(s): Confession
Release: 2009
Pen Bleed Publishing (ASCAP)

[talk] This one goes out to all the little kids that don’t know no better (to all the penitentiary fathers). . . And all the grown folks that should (and all the kids they left behind). . . . Believe me. . . I understand. . . .

Picture perfect households; ha, not here
Cuz in my city you either shed blood or shed tears
I gave both in my years, realistic prison fears
Spilled two beers before my lifestyle became clear
I was raised around street hustlas, thugs and heat holders
Runnin the blocks with double glocks screamin ‘we soldiers’
Worriless puffin on a blunt of sweet dosia
It wasn’t till rock bottom I took complete notice
My seed was in the soil ‘bout to be born
While I’m lookin at three walls and steel bars for comfort
I’m torn, hell hath no fury like a woman’s scorn; ring the alarm
Emotions higher in the eye of the storm
My blood runs through the veins of another; moments that last
Almost cried when I touched the little palm on the glass; it hurt
I couldn’t hold my daughter, treated insane
Imagine as my first time as dad she seen me in chains
Over time became a toddler; they grow so fast
Parole granted, damn, daddy’s coming home at last
But I’m frightened; when I went to hug, she ran and grabbed her mother
I wonder if her little heart could learn how much I love her

You only get one life
I know its hard to survive in the city when its do or die
But Imma do right; Imma do right
And be the father figure that you need in your life (x2)

Bein in and out of prison has me missin precious moments
Like young dreams unfolding and sunset of golden
Theres no excuse and no returning time we lost
And there aint enough sorries that could be said to heal the scars
I shoulda been there to hold you on your date of birth
And I shoulda been there when ‘daddy’ was your first word
And I shoulda been there to embrace and show you love
Maybe Im a hopeless thug; you shouldn’t have to adjust
Hardly a father, still a stranger through your vision
If its tenderness you need then delicately I’mma give it
Listen, in this condition we’re livin in forgiveness is crucial
I know I love you, but its hard to tell the feelings mutual
Handed you 3 tootsie rolls to ease the fear of changes
But you declined cuz you were taught not to take candy from strangers
The hardest thing in life is learning when to ask for help
I look to god cuz I cant succeed all by myself
My dad was never there; the coward gave no sympathy
I’m never gonna disappear again; I’ll do it differently
This time around I’mma be a better father
Its nightfall, but in time the sun will shine tomorrow